De Tigris ain’t just a river in Turkey!
McCullen told me this story about the Russian guy at the store (Marseilles? What the fuck kind of name is this for anyone—other than, like, a Marquise or some shitty noble, who would be too busy penning billets doux to be working at a liquor store anyway—much less a Russian?). Marseilles was coming to the register from the back of the store with this customer who was holding this bottle of beer, and the customer was like, “Yeah, I thought you had it, I’m telling you man, it’s really expensive,” and Marseilles was like, “No vay,” and he rang it up and one bottle of beer was ten dollars and the guy was like, “See, it’s from Canada, it’s so expensive, a sixty-dollar six-pack but it’s really good, I was just surprised you even had it.” Marseilles looked at the bottle very carefully because he was so surprised. Then the guy left with his beer and Marseilles shook his head and said loudly to himself, “SUPER CRAZY…SUPER VEIRD!” So I have been saying this to myself about everything ever since I heard that story.
Example:
Co-worker: Hey, Worker #3116, how are you coming along on that work that you are doing for your job.
Worker #3116: Fine. Get off my back.
Okay, that’s a really bad example, because I couldn’t think off the top of my head what a good situation for “SUPER CRAZY…SUPER VEIRD!” would be, I’m not a magician, a-holes. But I do say it to myself, usually just out of context and in my head, unlike Marseilles who says it in context and SUPER LOUD.