White House Criticizes Bennett for Remarks on Race
WASHINGTON - The White House on Friday criticized former Education Secretary William Bennett for remarks linking the crime rate and the abortion of black babies.
“The president believes the comments were not appropriate,” White House press secretary Scott McClellan said.
Bennett, on his radio show, “Morning in America,” was answering [...]

Clown Coffee: Ugh, are you eating an orange again?
Worker #3116: Yes. What is your problem?
Clown Coffee: They smell.
Worker #3116: Seriously, were you abused by an orange as a child?

There have been a lot of pretty big news stories this week. Tom DeLay was indicted on conspiracy charges. Jack Abramoff was linked to a mobland murder. Senator Majority Leader Bill Frist is being investigated for inappropriate stock sales. John Roberts Jr. was sworn in as America’s Next Top Justice. Judith Miller decided she was [...]

Deadbeat Père is in France on le vacation. Then, I got an email this week from Grand-Père #3116 telling me to sign up for Sike! or whatever that free-internet telephone service is. So I wrote him back telling him I would look into it, and then, trying to be a member of the “family,” I [...]

Did you know that Applebee’s’s slogan is “Eatin’ Good in the Neighborhood!”?
Did you know that “strip-mall next to the highway exit-ramp” is a neighborhood?

There was a lot of yelling last night.
I’ll give you the two main examples:
Stevil and I created a neologism: cramazing. It means “crazy amazing.” I like to say it in the sing-songy voice that one uses for ca-razy! Stevil likes to say it in the Oprah-Winfrey-Announces-Her-Annual-Giveaway-Show voice, which involves yelling. It sounds something like this: [...]

A long time ago, China Jet and I were at the zoo. We were in the Fish House when we stumbled upon a display about the elusive Giant Squid (or Architeuthis, the Greek name for “ruling” or “chief” squid). Both of us were held completely captive by descriptions of eyes as large as dinner plates, [...]

Now, maybe it’s just the freedom-hating, homo-marrying liberal in me, but I find it despicable that this guy in the cowboy hat is just going to sit calmly by while Laura Bush devours that poor, innocent black child.

People are always asking me, “Why do you still watch the Real World,” and “Do you really watch the Real World, why?” or my favorite question: “The Real World SUCKS!”
Here is why: earlier this week McCullen was walking down the street and passed by a sorority girl on her cell-phone who said, “Did you know [...]

Mom #3116 has built a career out of helping high-risk teens get back on track towards a college education. These are generally youths with alcoholic and/or incarcerated parents, poor social skills, mild sociopathic tendencies, and a history of physical and mental abuse. This is a wonderful service Mom #3116 provides both her students and the [...]