Buy More Worker #3116
Last weekend I indicated that I would like there to be a Worker #3116 jingle that played whenever I entered a room, and out of nowere Hamtram goes, “Actually, I have a jingle.” And I’m like “WHAT?” And he’s like, “I have a jingle.” Upon further investigation it turns out that Dreamy’s boyfriend, who WRITES JINGLES FOR A LIVING, wrote one for Hamtram just because, I don’t know, they’re secretly gay for each other or whatever. A personalized PROFESSIONAL jingle? Jesus Christ. Who died and made Hamtram the luckiest? Anyway, JEALOUS MUCH? YES.
Then, since it was me, Hamtram, and Stevil bopping around town, we wrote a jingle for Stevil right there on the spot. It goes to the old-school Batman song, and it goes “Da na na na na na na na, da na na na na na na na, Stevil! Stevil! Steeeevillllll!” This is a good jingle! I was so pissed. Everyone at this point had a sweet fucking jingle except for me, the person who first voiced the desire to have one.
So I fucking made one my fucking self.
And let me ask those other two bitches this? Does your jingle have bomb explosions in it? NO IT DOES NOT.
January 6th, 2006 at 2:36 pm
His mind is dirty
but his face is clean
Get your blog on
with Worker #3116.
He dresses all casual
at the office and the zoo
cause he knows the answer to
“What would J-Crew do?”.
January 6th, 2006 at 3:07 pm
I already have an awesome jingle, Big John, and it’s better than this piece of shit jingle.
Where is the explosions?
January 6th, 2006 at 4:47 pm
Really Big W, not so much. And the explosions sounded like your Quadra 600 had broccoli for lunch.
We could throw big money at my version — celebrity voices, hollywood musicians and producers, and the finest Jew accountants. This could be huge man, you better recognize.
January 6th, 2006 at 5:11 pm
this is a good jingle. not special john’s, which is a little facile, but 3116’s which is ironic. i must confess that my favorite part was when the mp3 ended and winamp decided to play a track entitled “sounds of nature - long soothing rain.” apocalypse right now!
January 7th, 2006 at 12:33 am
sweet jingle. now you just to choreograph a little video around it… like a lead-in to your own personal television show.
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