Terror at Home
As you may have heard, yesterday, American forces near Baquba killed Abu Masab al-Zarqawi in an airstrike. al-Zarqawi, of course, is the head of al-Qaeda in Iraq, and one of the most visible, and violent, leaders of the insurgencies.
Now that terrorism is over, I think we should focus on the threat at home: people who own white cars.
White cars are so fucking sick. When I see them I want to throw up. My dick recedes into my body and suddenly everything smells like menthol. They’re like mobile eye-rapes, going from place to place ruining the world. By place to place, of course, I mean gas station to liquor store and back again. But I digress. America: what was nuclear war invented for if not to rid the world of parasitic evil like white cars. When I see white cars I immediately think of three things.
And know this: if you aren’t with me, you are against me, and that is not a false ontological statement. It is based in the very real, very logical fact of my mildly irrational disgust with white cars, which are sick, and which I totally hate.
Luckily, the good work has already started.
June 8th, 2006 at 11:20 am
they are “evildoers”
June 9th, 2006 at 8:06 am
white cars make me think of cheap laundry detergent, dog shit, and sour milk. total ghetto.
Leave a Reply