I’m Still Your Fag
This is the super for my new apartment:
He lives on the top floor with his wife, who is a police officer. Here is what I know about the super for my new apartment:
-Don’t botha me at night
He has thigh-sized biceps and wears the traditional gold chain and wife beater. I am 98% sure he thinks I am a faggot. Here is a sample exchange:
Super: You got a lotta clothes.
Worker #3116: Yeah.
Super: Wass all that? Oh, mo clothes.
But you can’t always judge a person by the Saint they wear around their neck. Just today I was wandering around the neighborhood and ran into Super. He complimented me on my Diesel watch and compared it to a Fossil watch that he apparently has had his eye on. I may be just another gentrifying faggot in his eyes, but maybe, just maybe, he also sees me as the key to a better life.
August 9th, 2006 at 5:22 pm
Your super looks … super! But don’t let him into your place anymore. I’ve seen enough — more than enough — L&Os to know that the super can do you in. He’ll either kill you, let someone in to kill you, or tell on you for killing someone.
August 9th, 2006 at 6:05 pm
What? No way. On L&O every single super’s line is this:
“Mrs. Fitzpatrick? Nice old lady. Tips well. No, I haven’t seen her in three weeks. And yeah, I suppose there is a funny smell from her apartment.”
The L&O super notices fishy things but always does nothing to investigate.
August 9th, 2006 at 6:11 pm
Excuse me, Optimus. I am watching all the L&Os on DVD right now — so don’t question me — but you are perhaps right that the super is more usually an obstructionist or a hostile witness type. I was once a hostile witness, but that’s another story.
I just saw an episode from Season 2 (that’s right) in which the super turns in a killer to save his own arsehole.
I will consider your motion and have an answer for you first thing in the morning. See you in chambers.
August 9th, 2006 at 7:19 pm
diesel watch? what do you mean he THINKS you’re gay?
August 10th, 2006 at 3:27 am
That guy rules.
August 10th, 2006 at 9:55 am
Neil moved back to New York?
August 10th, 2006 at 11:42 am
yeah that’s totally “new york native neil”
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