Somebody Please Kill This Guy [Insert Guy to Kill]
Today marks the start of a new occasional feature called Somebody Please Kill This Guy [Insert Guy to Kill] where I see a guy I want you to kill and I tell you about him.
For the first installment it’s the guy I just saw in the printed designer t-shirt under the blazer, wearing big sunglasses, carrying a guitar, on his way into Dean and Deluca, talking on his cell phone, saying “Well so let’s get lunch before I go to Paris.”
Kill that guy.
May 10th, 2007 at 5:06 pm
You realize that your blog is going to be just like Perez Hilton’s - instead of “first” you will get…
NULLUS!
Love,
F-
(and still waiting for the answer key)
May 10th, 2007 at 5:14 pm
Hah, fantastic Though this is eerily similar to my site’s forthcoming recurring feature called “Whoops You Look Like That”
May 10th, 2007 at 5:17 pm
What a clever way of ADVERTISING YOUR OWN SITE, Maximum Black Silvestri.
You are going to be the biggest name on livejournal.
May 10th, 2007 at 5:36 pm
Before you kill this guy I’d like to screw him, then date him for about 6 months, then have him dump me by just not returning my phone calls.
May 10th, 2007 at 7:41 pm
aaaand i love you.
May 10th, 2007 at 8:19 pm
SOUNDS LIKE SOMEONE IS JEALOUS THEY DONUT GET TO GO TO PARIDS
May 10th, 2007 at 10:28 pm
is it this guy?
http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=9849421
cos, i could totally see him saying that.
May 10th, 2007 at 11:11 pm
I would like to add the name Fred Durst to this particular project and/or company.
Thanking you in advance for your co-operation.
May 11th, 2007 at 12:30 am
In a very similar scenario, I saw this guy a few weeks ago who inspired similar feelings and still haunts me to this day. He was a White Man, with long dreadlocks tied in a bun, wearing a Mean People Suck t-shirt and going into a Starbucks WEARING ROLLERBLADES. He was with a group of people who all looked like Investment Bankers. It was devastating.
May 11th, 2007 at 9:32 am
I would be more than happy to, but what’s in it for me? Will you be killing people that I would like to see dead? Because I live in DC and there are sooo many of them that I think we should get started immediately. For my first candidate, I would like to propose my roommate’s boyfriend, who quit a lucrative job to work for MoveOn.org, signed himself up for dubious malaria drug trials, and thinks that putting a 50% tax on gasoline is a “really good idea”. Sic ‘em!
May 11th, 2007 at 10:45 am
John… I saw whitey with dreads on rollerblades inside of Barnes & Noble… He was on the phone and was all like “Yo man, you know what’s the hardest part about rollerblading? Telling your dad that you’re gay!”. And I was all like, “true, true”. He was wearing the t-shirt of a unicorn mounting a horse and there’s a rainbow behind them. I hate rainbows so I don’t like the guy and would be in favor of having someone kill him.
May 11th, 2007 at 11:08 am
What’s awesome is that the next, like, dozen installments of this feature can be about the people who have commented on this one.
May 11th, 2007 at 11:42 am
Dear Eli!
Seconded!
Oh, wait.
May 16th, 2007 at 10:17 pm
more!
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