Clean Shaven Legs

By Anne 8 months ago

It’s Saturday night and I’m exhausted. Things have been so busy these days that I feel like I’m just rushing through the day from one thing to another with no time to sit back and enjoy any one of them.

Today, I was so mixed up that I went to a birthday pool party an hour EARLY! I was standing there with my son looking around and wondering why no one else was there (we were supposed to meet at the pool of an apartment building complex). Then when I called my friend, I thought it was strange that she sounded surprised to hear from me and said that she wasn’t ready yet but would come and get me at the pool as soon as she could. Aren’t we supposed to meet out here? Why isn’t she here already? It took me a good three minutes to figure it out. Duh! I’m super early.

She kindly let us hang out in her apartment as she got ready for the party. I felt so bad. This is not how I imagined coming to her place for the first time.

It gets better. I was in such a rush this morning that I forgot to shave my legs for the party (it had been on my to do list for days but I just hadn’t gotten to it!). But this was a pool party and my son would surely want me to go in the pool with him. After a few minutes of thinking about the awkwardness of what I was about to do, I asked my friend in a sheepish voice if I could borrow a razor to shave my legs. Yup, I did! I figured I had an hour before any of the other guests arrived so I might as well squeeze in one of my to dos.

That’s what my life has come to. I don’t even have time to shave my legs!!

So there I was in my friend’s bathroom shaving my legs and thinking about how crazy I was when I just started laughing at myself (you know what they say about laughing so you don’t cry!).

The rest of the day was one event after another…and now it’s 10:30 pm and I’m about to pass out from exhausted.

My one big consolation…I have clean shaven legs!

NO ARMPITS, PLEASE

Ladies, please don’t show off your armpits. It’s a private area and should not be displayed!

I understand that it gets really hot in the summer and sometimes you want to wear a pretty dress or top that happens to be sleeveless to work or a formal event. Go ahead. Wear it. But please, I beg you, resist the urge to stretch your arms above your head or lean back in your chair casually and put your hands behind your head while in contemplation. You see, when you do that, you expose your naked armpit to the world and that’s just not right.

And it’s not just women (although you’ll be hard pressed to find a man wearing a sleeveless shirt to work or a formal event! Can you even imagine that?) If a man ever did such a thing I’d be equally disturbed.

I have nothing against armpits generally, especially if they’re nicely maintained (you know what I’m talking about ladies). I just think armpits are an area of the woman’s body that should not be exposed. I think they are awkward, intimate and mildly sensual in nature (not to me but I know to some – warning, do not click on the link if you are an armpit prude) and therefore totally inappropriate for exposure in work or formal environments.

Lastly, I hate the word “armpit”…couldn’t they come up with a less crass name? We don’t call the area where our legs attach to our bodieslegpits. The “pit” part of the word reminds of a slimy hard center of a fruit that you’re awkwardly holding in your hand while looking for the trash after you’ve finished eating the delicious part…I know, lovely image.

Now, if I could remember to follow my own advice!

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  life
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